Only occasionally am I unable to speak about an athletic performance. I have been fortunate to witness, live and in-person, Olympic gold medal moments in volleyball and rowing and gymnastics, and world championships won in several sports over the years.

Which brings me to last week at the Shaw Festival here in Niagara-on-the-Lake. It was my second time watching this year’s magnificent production of “One Man, Two Guvnors,” which I had to see twice because of my limited attention span and hearing challenges. Yes, the production value was incredible, but my basic theatrical IQ was forced to new levels by the extraordinary athleticism and body control shown by Matt Alfano as Alfie and Peter Fernandes as Francis.

Alfie seems to be a shaky senior as he stumbles his way through the show as a waiter in the Cricketers’ Arms in Brighton on the English seaside. His pacemaker causes him grief, and controlling his Parkinson’s shakes as he attempts to serve food forces the audience to silently cheer for him.

Even with a crash pad at the bottom of the steps it is incredible that he does not seriously injure himself during the show. How he contorts himself into an extended back bend, holding the position for a tortuous length of time, is beyond me. Even after I have watched Nadia Comăneci practice on the balance beam for a whole week in Strasbourg in 1979, and Bulldogs Ole Sorensen, Paul Jenkins and Dave Osepchook workout on the parallel bars in 1967 in St. Catharines.

But then, Alfano somehow balances himself on a bottle of Châteauneuf-du-Pape, as he struggles to pop the cork and serve the wine to dinner guests at the pub in Brighton. I just can’t pen the words to describe my incredulity at this performance.

Now let’s discuss Peter Fernandes as he treats us to pratfall after pratfall as Francis. This University of Alberta grad is one of the busiest people in Canadian theatre, but somehow doesn’t run out of energy as he athletically and theatrically pushes his creative envelope.

Fernandes boldly suggested that the Shaw Festival give him the chance to interpret this role. Diving around the stage while delivering rapid-fire line after rapid-fire line, occassionally engaging the audience, he never misses a physical or verbal beat.

Chautauqua’s own Allan Teichman delivers another stellar show as stage manager, and to my fairly practiced eye, never misses a sound or lighting cue as he keeps pace with Fernandes and the other cast members. He says his favourite Shaw show has been “all of them,” and bringing shows to life has kept him engaged and in a state of perpetual challenge.

So, I ramble on and marvel at the theatrical and athletic talents of the Shaw company. I dropped by the annual cricket match contested between the Shaw and Stratford theatres. Good athletes, yes but on the Shaw’s stages and in the Speigeltent, I simply cannot comprehend the level of talents.

Even on the Niagara Parkway’s recreational trail I have observed a good number of Shaw actors zipping along on their bikes. Ryann Myers from New Jersey seems effortless as she pedals from Old Town to Queenston, stopping on sunny days for a world class ice cream cone at Walker’s Country Market.

Now, I will ramble to a close by venturing out of my comfort zone. “My Fair Lady” has been the mega hit this season and audiences have never stopped applauding the show. What do I know, but Taurain Teelucksingh is a total show stopper as Freddy, singing “On the Street Where You Live.”

What power, what projection, what a finale, as we NOTLers are treated, on the streets where we live our lives, to such world class performances.

Last Friday, I called the Shaw Festival to ask if Taurian was a baritone or a bass. An hour later, before I received a return call, he walked past me in front of the Court House on Queen Street.

I grabbed the opportunity to ask the star himself. He pondered and ruminated, then humbly replied, “Put me down as a tenor.”

What a town, eh?

We are so lucky to live in Niagara-on-the-Lake, in Canada. In 2024.