For Mary, having access to Pathstone Mental Health’s services has been a life-changing experience.

It’s been a tough few years for Mary, who is now 16. She’s dealt with unimaginable grief, depression, anxiety and bullying at the hands of classmates.

Plus she lived through a pandemic that inspired societal changes no one ever foresaw.

Today, she is doing much better, thanks to Pathstone and a program her grandmother says has been “a godsend.”

Mary isn’t her real name because, unfortunately, society’s stigma when it comes to mental illness can be as debilitating as the illness itself.

Eight years ago, Mary’s father died by suicide, plunging her family into a crisis of grief that few can appreciate.

Mary’s grandmother, we’ll call her Anne, lives in Niagara-on-the-Lake, so Mary and her mom moved to St. Catharines from the Toronto area to be close to family for support and help.

Mary was “always full of fun but her father’s death really knocked the stuffing out of her,” Anne says. “It was very, very hard for her.”

As the new kid at her elementary school in St. Catharines, Mary tried to fit in, all while privately dealing with the grief of losing a parent.

Her doctor arranged counselling, which helped a lot, Anne says.

But before long, problems started at school, starting with verbal abuse by two other girls from her Grade 4 class. Mary tried to ignore it and walk away, but then it grew into punching, kicking and hair-pulling assaults.

School officials and the police all said there was nothing they could do.

The principal worried the aggressors themselves were perhaps dealing with trouble at home; the police said it was a problem for the school to handle. The assailants were told to stop; they didn’t.

Eventually, the COVID pandemic hit and learning moved to online-only. But, for Mary, the damage was done. And like many of her generation, growing up amid COVID only exacerbated problems.

Fast-forward a few years, she entered high school, still scarred and traumatized after the bullying during her formative years. Still in need of help.

Then the family heard about a special Pathstone school program with only six students in a classroom, plus a teacher and a counsellor.

Mary applied and her family thought she was on a wait list, Anne says, but somehow she fell through the cracks for nearly two years.

This past January that all changed. Mary got in, embraced the program and is “doing so much better.”

“The psychologist at the school, and the teacher, both told her that she would be safe there. Because she didn’t want to go to school,” Anne says.

Now, she’s learning, engaged, making friends, showing progress, dealing with the world around her.

“Pathstone was like a godsend for her. Now, she’s getting her credits. She feels better about herself and I think it’s all because she feels safe,” she says.

The family is starting to again see the child they once knew. “She’s starting to get back to being herself,” Anne says.

“She so needs to be where she is right now and we’re so thankful to Pathstone for this opportunity to get her on an even keel and to give her some of the coping skills she needs.”