Paul Jacot
Special to The Lake Report

During this whole pandemic, we must find something to laugh about, a chuckle here and there, anything to break the sometimes morbid state of affairs.

*****

I threw my hands in the air and shouted a few bad, nasty words. There wasn’t a soul around. I was standing alone, no jacket, just a dress shirt, (in early March) amid hundreds of empty Buffalonian cars in the Buffalo airport parking lot. I shouted so loudly the lonely parked cars were wiping away the tears with their windshield wipers. My car’s battery was dead.

I said to my wife and stalwart travelling companion that I would kiss the ground in NOTL when we got back from our trip of a lifetime cruise (Dubai to Tokyo). Perfect, we got back safely and dodged the virus. We self-isolated in NOTL for over two weeks and then flew to Florida to see our grandchildren who live in Gainesville (Gator and Tom Petty country) to help then during the March break. We had a warm, sunny and enriching visit, and then flew home through Buffalo.

After landing in Buffalo airport (always a great place to fly out of, almost never crowded) I could feel my heart thumping. “Home soon.” Not so fast Charlie!

But wait. Hooray, the maintenance people in the parking area gave me a boost and we were able to race home (heresy, not even stopping at Tops or TJ Max). When finally home, (heart pounding) I left the car running in the driveway, ran to the backyard and kissed the ground and yelled, “Oh, Canada!”

Being away from home amid the crisis makes you tense for sure.

My wife and I are self-isolating (again) at home in NOTL and finding the days like granola bars: some chewy, some sweet. Tips? Give each other space, remember you married like a butcher, for better or for wurst.

We will get through this. We will. We need patience and faith in each other to do the right thing.

Are there some positives, silver linings in this serious virus situation? Of course, much more gratitude for what we do have here in NOTL, acts of kindness in our community being shown (bringing groceries to seniors for example), stronger family and friend ties through FaceTime and texting.

Also, when this is over, you will get to “elbow bump” people again, you will be able to play the party game “Twister,” gasoline prices will be much lower, gamblers will have saved lots of money thanks to the casinos being closed and people will be more considerate (hopefully) about washing their hands in public washrooms.

Now, what about a few common nursery rhymes appropriate for the times? Create one yourself and maybe we’ll publish them. Here are my attempts:

Little Jack Hoarder

Little Jack Hoarder

sat in his corner

Counting his toilet rolls

He got to two hundred, smiled

and wondered

“What a two-ply hoarder am I?”

Humpty Grumpty

Humpty Grumpty sat in his chair

Humpty Grumpty growled like a bear

For all of the king's horses and all the king's men

Couldn't put his sports on TV again.

Jack and Jill

Jack and Jill went up the hill

To fetch some isolation

Jack came down and broke his crown

Thus ending their staycation.